It’s so unfair that life just carries on. Society has given grievers a year window to feel all the grief and get it out of us and then we are supposed to have moved on. Our grief brain should have cleared up, our tears shouldn’t flow so easily anymore, important days are second, thirds, tenths that we shouldn’t be as sensitive to anymore. We are supposed to relish in our memories and ‘just be grateful for the time we had’. People forget or avoid saying their name. Work, friends, family aren’t so sensitive to your pain anymore. Our pain is as forgotten as their life was to many people. Say their name! Remind everyone they are not forgotten because you have not forgotten. Show your grief because showing it and it’s lasting effects is the only way anybody will ever see that grief doesn’t end after 1 year.
Incorporate your loved one in conversations. Share their memories; we can’t make more so make the ones you have last. Include them in present day moments by saying things like ‘so&so would have loved this song or so&so loved pizza’. Make it normal and natural for their name to still be part of the conversation.
Remember Me – Music From “Coco”